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* ...You go to the store and buy PineFresh litter, and forget to buy toilet paper.
* ...You have more pictures framed of your ferrets than you do of your children.
* ...You really think your ferrets are your children.
* ...You shuffle everywhere instead of walking for fear of stepping on a ferret - (this looks odd in public places).
* ...You begin to think "Eau de Hob" smells as good as Joy.
* ...You're really ticked off because there's no shopping channel for ferrets.
* ...You won't go on vacation because you're afraid to leave the "children" with a stranger - even if she is your sister.
* ...When you get mad at your husband you hiss and bite his toes.
* ...You don't have enough mantle and adjacent wall space to hang stockings for all your ferrets, and yell at your kids if they try to put up theirs (greedy pigs!)
* ...You get sick and make an appointment for yourself at the vet's.
* ...You discuss ferret poop with another ferret fanatic and actually find this subject interesting.
* ...You get mad at a co-worker and grab him with your teeth at the back of the neck and shake him.
* ...You're late to work because it took so long to kiss all your ferrets good-bye.
* ...You make duck soup for your husband when he gets sick and force feed him with a syringe if he refuses to eat it.
* ...While others lobby for ferret rights, you are outraged because they don't get to vote.
* ...You can always think of a very good reason to keep or get just one more - after all, "How much trouble can one more be?"
* ...You'll watch a 2-hour movie to catch a 2-second glance of another ferret.
* ...You get really disgusted if the toilet seat is left up, but are not disgusted by cleaning poop from the floor and emptying litter boxes every day (sigh).
* ...You're totally grossed out if you step in dog poop, but not when you step in ferret poop.
* ...You realize that most of what you have written is about ferret poop.
Ferrets are in fact 10% love and joy, and 90% poop.
By Meg Carpenter
YOU MIGHT BE A FERRET FANATIC IF...
Most pets display so many humanlike traits and emotions it's easy to forget they're not gifted with the English language and then get snubbed when we talk to them and they don't say anything back. ~Stephenie Geist
If you have a summer cottage that you visit frequently during the summer months, find a local veterinarian and schedule a ""get acquainted visit"". Bring copies of your pet's records to this appointment so your pet's history can be placed on file. This will make things much easier if an emergency situation arises.
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